"In Life, Lying to someone you Love will always most definitely result in Loss."
Its really a simple equation, one that most of us know in our hearts to be true without anyone ever really telling us. Yet, even with this knowledge we still find it necessary to lie to the people we love, and not only do we do this, but we find selfish "justifiable" reasons to do so.
"I did it for you... I didn't want to hurt you... I was afraid of how you would react..." examples of the excuses we feed ourselves to feed our motives, but the truth of the matter is that behind all of these "yous" there is actually a very loud "I/Me". Really what we mean is "I did it for me... I didn't want this truth to hurt me... I was afraid of how you would react, and how it would affect me". That is the reality of the situation, whether we want to admit it to ourselves or to the people we blatantly lie to,
As much as we try to separate the two, Omission is lying. That is just the truth. Failing to say something, trying to conceal it, beating around the bush, these are all forms of the same thing, lying. But no one likes the word, no one wants to be called a liar, its harsh, its ugly, it makes us feel badly. Who have you ever heard saying "I'm a liar and proud of it"
We can't lie to someone and claim to love them, this is not love, we can not claim to trust someone, to have faith in them and turn around and keep things from them, out of "fear" of the outcome. The truth should always be spoken, only this way can we have a real relationship of any kind based on trust.
Omitting even the smallest details, or what you consider to be small and meaningless could mean a lot more to someone else who has placed trust in you, and when you keep that from them you leave room for that trust to be broken, and trust is something that once lost is a hell of a hard thing to earn back.
Maybe i'm ranting, maybe i'm just writing this because I was the idiot that ommitted the truth from someone that I love, and now i have to live with that. But seriously. Just take it from someone that has lost the most precious thing in her life, It's never worth it, no amount of fear, pride of stupid justification is ever worth it.
Lying/Ommitting information also leads to taking front. We become less trustING of the other person as a result of our own deceitfulness... I'm sorry for whatever loss you've suffered :( It's really such a touchy topic, lying. We lie, get caught, suffer the consequences, & then wonder if the consequences would have been as great or significantly less if we'd told the truth. Sometimes the outcome won't change, but our image will. Perhaps the only difference is that we won't be labeled a liar on top of it
ReplyDeleteThank you for the response, there is definitely truth behind what you say, honestly looking back I would have preferred to be deemed unworthy than a liar. Mistakes only stay mistakes when we don't learn from them, when we do they are just life lessons.
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